Stop waiting for everything to return to normal to start living again. There is still beauty, joy, laughter and we can enjoy life right where we are.
When things started changing last year, I thought it was temporary.
I held my breath and thought, when this is over, I will start living again.
It showed up in my attitudes and plans.
It took me months to realize, that I was putting my life on hold. I was delaying living.
I mean fully living and enjoying life.
I was so busy holding my breath and trying to figure out how to function in the new situation, that I remember thinking, “Just get through this. It is only temporary. Get through this and then you can breathe and enjoy life again.”
I was trudging reluctantly along. Looking forward to the day when this would end, and I could go back to feeling joy.
But it went on. For weeks. And months.
I found myself powering through. Trying to adapt. Grieve losses. But not wanting to get too comfortable.
Is this you? Are you delaying living to some extent?
Are you saying, “I can be happy and relax again only when things return to normal?”
Or maybe you are delaying in other ways.
For other reasons.
Are you a delayer?
We delay all sorts of things.
Things we need. Like happiness, thankfulness, joy, feeling positive, or liking our self?
Or maybe we delay using things. Our grandmother’s china. Wearing that new dress. Reading that new book.
Maybe we delay stating a new project. Using our talents. Stepping out to serve. Cleaning the house. Thanking the neighbor.
If you are like me, you delay things. Necessary things, little things, good things.
I know, there’s a reason. But it is probably is not a very good reason.
My reason wasn’t very good. It went something like this: “Let’s not get too comfortable or enjoy life when all this is going on.”
Just read the news, talk to your neighbor, or look at your own life. Something is always going on. And things will be going on until the day I leave this earth.
Like I said. Not the most rational excuse.
It seems fear and worry fuel most of our reasons. These two vice-grips are not healthy places to live. Nor are they places God wants us to live.
What are you delaying?
Do you delay being in a family picture until you have lost ten pounds? Do you only use your grandmother’s fine tea set when someone really important (and careful) comes over, which hasn’t happened yet, because you are not inviting anyone over until the house get a good spring cleaning?
Do you delay counting your blessings until life straightens out? Decide not to let yourself be happy until the tests come back negative? Put off stating a family until everything is perfect? Not take that scary next step and use your talents to bless others until life improves? Forgo date nights until the kids are older and the puppy potty trained? Not dream until you have enough money to dream?
What small things and big things are you delaying?
How is fear or worry holding you back?
Have you given up on quiet time as long as you have small kids in the house? Delayed being vulnerable until you have it all together? Decided not to love your mate until they love you back? Are you waiting for the other person to apologize first? Chosen until the current trial is over before returning to church? Decided not to try counseling until things get seriously bad? Chosen not to deal with the bitterness until it shows on your face? Not set boundaries for yourself until you feel valuable enough?
God wants us living. Enjoying. Loving. Not delaying.
Even in hard times. We can live in the hard and still experience some joy.
Start enjoying life right where you are.
I was lying in a hospital bed with broken bones when a guy walked into the room. He was about my dad’s age and I knew him just a little. He was a quiet kind of guy, the opposite of his wife who lit up a room with her words and personality.
He sat, and we exchanged a few pleasantries. Then silence came and stayed awhile. Finally, he said, “We often wait for our boat to come in to start being happy or living.”
I nodded, not sure where he was going. Was he talking about himself? His grown children? Someone living near the ocean?
I looked at the clock. I wasn’t waiting for a boat. I was waiting for lunch to be served.
He started again after a few minutes. “We often wait for a whole bouquet of flowers to be happy, even though we are already holding a flower or two in our hand.”
I nodded. Boats to bouquets. Still not sure where his talk was headed.
He continued. “We wait and wait for the bouquet, never enjoying the two flowers we already have. Life sometimes goes by and we never get the whole bouquet at once. But when we look back, we see we were given the bouquet flower by flower.”
His words hung themselves in my mind.
He wasn’t talking about boats or flowers, he was saying. “Be happy now with what you have. Don’t delay and wait for everything to be just right. Notice and find joy in what you already have.”
He was restating what Solomon said: Find joy in your current life. Eat. Drink. Be merry now.
Stop sleepwalking through life.
When I finally realized I was delaying living my life, I started paying attention to the stress I was carrying and made steps to put it down.
I also started enjoying life more. I laughed more and embraced some spontaneity. Looked for the beauty. Counted my blessings. Looked for the positive and made a careful search for joy.
They were all there. I just needed to search for them. Make time for them. Craft room for them. Count them and treasure them.
Nothing big happened. My purpose stayed the same. My address stayed the same. My circumstances stayed the same. My routine stayed mainly the same.
What changed was my attitude. This changed my awareness, which changed my expectations. The shift happened in my brain. But outwardly, these made small shifts in my actions.
Nothing big, but now I am more content and living life with more joy.
If you are delaying life. Do the same.
Don’t wait for things to get perfect enough, or you will be waiting a long time.
Quit delaying. Start living. Doing. Wearing. Using. Inviting. Changing. Stepping out. Laughing.
Life is meant to be enjoyed.
Use what God has given you. And then bless those around you with your gifts, stuff, and vibrant personality.
Don’t delay living life to the fullest. Start living now.
Thanks for stopping by. Keep remembering what’s important.
Theresa
Join the discussion: What have you been delaying?
May link up at Kelly Balarie (#purposeful faith), Crystal Storms (#HeartEncouragement), Maree Dee (#Grace & Truth), Anita Ojeda (#inspirememonday), InstaEncouagements ((IE Link-Up), and Mary Geison (#tellhisstory).
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Thank you for this message today. As a women over 60, I feel like my life has definitely been on hold for the past 10 months. So many things have changed in this time. I keep waiting for some normalcy but it doesn’t come. It seems to only get more restrictive. My work, my church, my travels, my visits to family….everything. I had tried to stay in touch with people and keep a positive attitude but some days are really tough. I am lucky that I still have a job but that has also had lots of stresses over the past year. I just want a chance to live again in God’s joy for us. I am working on it. I really did appreciate your message to help but content in the moment and not keep expecting quick changes. Just…..thank you.
Hi Becky. You are giving voice to how so many of us feel. Can things just return to normal? It is hard to be content and find joy in small things and realize that God knows how this is going, how it will end, and is walking with us. But we can do it. Find the small splashes here and there. Do something you enjoy for a little while each day. Ask God to help you connect with others. Let yourself feel some joy (I love to watch the birds at my feeders). Praying for you. Thanks for visiting.
Beautifully written as always, Theresa. We do tend to want to wait until everything is “perfect” to live our lives. The problem is that things will never be perfect! Yes…so good – quit delaying. Start living! Every moment is precious. There are none to waste.
Hi Laurie. Yes, every moment is precious. Let’s use them wisely.
Great encouragement and insight on why we wait and how it holds us back from life. Thanks for sharing and inspiring me with your words!
Thanks Mary. May we live courageously.
Thank you, thank you for these timely words! I have been trudging through, day by day, hoping for better days to come. I have let my daily gratitude practice slack, and this is a perfect reminder to get back to it. The flower gardener in me also was loving the gorgeous photos too!
Hi to another flower lover. Flowers are just so cheerful (and they stay still for their picture). Yes, start back with your daily gratitude practice. We don’t want these hard times to win or take away the things that benefit us.
This is an important question to ask myself: What am I delaying??? Hmm… I’ll ponder on this, Jennifer!
I love this:
“God wants us living. Enjoying. Loving. Not delaying.
Even in hard times. We can live in the hard and still experience some joy.”
Definitely needed this word. Thank you!
Just read this and thought it applied. We don’t need everything to be going great to still find joy.
“Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
Though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
Though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.”
~ Habakkuk 3:17-18
Very encouraging in word and photos! As I read the post, Habakkuk 3:17-18 came to mind. Throughout this “holding pattern” we all seem to be in, I have been trying to find my joy in the Lord each day. We can find Him in the smallest of things and once found, the joy is so precious and lasts all day!
You are so right, Joanne. When I find my joy in the Lord each day, it lasts all day.
Inspiring and convicting words, Theresa! I’ve not necessarily been delaying living. I’ve sought out moments of joy and meaning in the mundane that these quarantines invoke. But I haven’t really appreciated them as much as I could. I think there’s more that God wants me to take in and pursue. Thanks for this nudge, my friend! You are one wise lady!
I agree with you. With me there has also been a quality of not enjoying moments of joy as much, and a yearning for things to change. The other day I thought of the Israelites and their complaints about wanting to go back to Egypt, the familiar. But God had better and different things for their future.
Wow, Theresa. You’ve put powerful words and a gentle challenge to us today.
To me.
I’m off to share this fine piece of writing with people in my world. Bless you for sharing your wisdom with us.
Thanks Linda.
I appreciate your message, Theresa. We can’t wait until everything is perfect and put conditions on our contentment.
Or we will be waiting for who knows how long, and disappointment will be our constant companion.
Thank you, Theresa for reminding me to be happy with the two flowers I have. This entire post resonated with me! I often don’t even realize I am “delaying” my life or white knuckling through to “better days”. I’ve started to notice how many times I say “I’ll do ____ after this…” only “after this” never comes. Great wisdom and encouragement here!
Oh Donna, knuckling through and delaying are things we do, don’t we? It’s like we don’t want to be happy until we can really and fully be happy. But if we are honest, there is always some reason to keep us from doing something and being happy. So let’s just go ahead and do it and be happy.
Theresa, what a powerful post. You’re right. We need to stop waiting to live our lives. For a myriad of reasons. we can never get this moment back again. We don’t get do-overs. Your words about holding off on a family photo till one can lose some weight hit me. We recently lost a family member, and now there are no more chances for family photos with that person in them. We can’t let fear strangle us from living each moment in the way God intends.
Jeanne, I am so sorry for your recent loss.
Let’s not let fear keep us from living as God intends us to. You are right. We don’t get do-overs for this time that is passing.
Theresa,
What a beautiful post. Your words resonated with me. There was a time when I waited to live life, but then the unexpected hit, and right in the middle of it, I realized I had to live life, or it would pass me by. I say that, yet I fall back into old ways so easily. Your words have encouraged me to take a look at what I am delaying.
I know when the pandemic first hit, I stayed put and delayed living a bit. But then I realized I had to get creative with how to live life even though it was different. It is such a challenge to stay safe for those around me who are vulnerable and live life, but it is possible. It just might take a little more effort and creativity.
Thank you for your words. I am going to feature your post on Grace & Truth on Friday. If you are not opposed, I will also pull a quote and make a graphic. Of course, I will give you credit.
Thanks Maree. Isn’t that common? We decide to live life to the fullest, and then down the road we slip back into letting it pass us by. It happens to us all. It does seem, that living life to the fullest now does take more effort and creativity. But it is so worth it. Keep at it my friend.
And yes, pull a quote and make a graphic. I’m honored.
These are timely reminders. It’s so easy to wait until things are “just right” to move forward. But we can take small steps wherever we are. And since God is with us everywhere we go and in every circumstance, we can always have joy if we rest in Him.
Yes, to small steps, Barbara. I imagine Jesus was the most joyful person ever. I read the other day that if he was a kill-joy, the children would not have been attracted to him and want to come to him. With Him beside us, we can have joy in all things.
Theresa,
You have packed a lot of wisdom into this powerful little piece.
In a world of people who suffer from depression, even severely so, it is hard to reach them with the little changes that can be made in the mind. I hope to be able to share this in a meaningful way. Thank you for presenting it beautifully.
Grammye, love the way you spell your name. You have made a good point. Depression can be so hard to walk through. And making small changes in your mind may not work as well. I know sometimes I need to actually put things that bring me joy on the to-do list so I remember to do them, or set aside time to do them. I would love to know what you think would work for those who are walking through depression. We are all unique individuals and often the same thing does not work for us all.
Theresa, your sequence: attitude, awareness, expectations. I think you have really pointed out the effects of disciplining our outlook. Depression can be anything from a really bad day to crippling unhappiness. I feel like what you have addressed is the change in direction early in the game. My hope is that people who are starting down the steps of despair will not descend to the basement but will return to the sunshine that is still upstairs. Thanks for being someone who wants to reach out with the hope we all need.
Grammye, that would be my hope as well.
Hi, stopping by from Linda Stoll’s and I’m glad I did. So much of this has and still describes me. Thanks for your wisdom and encouragement to live, now, not later.
Glad you stopped by, Deborah. Remembering that God does not want me to live in fear; that His love casts out fear, helps me not live so much in fear. Once I recognize I am living in fear and take steps to not let fear rule me. Praying about it. Reminding myself of God’s truth. And choosing love. All help me.